charisstoma: (default)
Okay, yeah, these things are true for the most part... for us.
But is this really how others see us?





18 Odd Things About America That Americans Think Are Normal


1. Other countries don't tip.
Elsewhere in the world, servers' wages are not dependent on tips. In many places, a tip is only given in cases of exceptional service. A tip is considered a bonus for going above and beyond—not the norm!

2. Portion sizes in the U.S. are ridiculously large.
Americans love their food! From BBQ to Chicago-style deep dish pizza, American food is some of the best that there is. One thing about American restaurants that baffles people from around the globe is the massive portion sizes. What can we say? There is nothing worse than finishing a meal and still being hungry.

3. Free refills aren't a thing in other countries.
Soda in the U.S. flows freely in all of its high-fructose corn syrupy glory! In almost any restaurant in America, soda refills are free. Americans take this for granted. When you go to other countries, expect to pay for each beverage you consume.
Ice tea and coffee too, oh and ice water.

4. Americans waste a lot of water.
Toilets in America use a lot of water! Americans shower daily. We water our lawns, even when it's raining. Foreigners see this behavior and they're often shocked. Other places in the world are in desperate need of water while we just let it run down the drain. In general, Americans have a more wasteful attitude toward resources than other countries.

5. Americans are obsessed with college sports.
College athletes are worshipped in America. Aren't they just students playing sports? Those in other countries are baffled by this treatment. Imagine how they'll react when they find out a growing number of sports fans want college athletes to be paid and treated as professional athletes!

6. We put sugar in bread.
Americans tend to have a sweet tooth. Bread in the U.S. is full of sugar. For that matter, most foods in America are full of sugar. It's unsettling to some foreign guests.

7. Did we mention we put sugar in everything?
Not only do we purchase processed foods that are full of sugar, we then add more sugar at the table. Whether it be coffee, tea, or strawberries, Americans never miss a chance to add some sugar.

8. We put cheese in a can.
Cheese isn't supposed to come in a can. It's just not. Aerosol cheese is not just puzzling to outsiders, it's an insult to all of the dairy farmers and cows out there.

9. We're a country filled with loud—but friendly—people.
Outsiders find people in America to be generally really loud and unnervingly friendly (although this partially depends on which area of the country you are in). It just isn't normal in many other countries to strike up a conversation with the person sitting next to you on the bus.

10. We have our own colloquial phrases.
America is a huge place, so common phrases and their meanings differ from region to region. It isn't difficult to see how non-Americans could be confused by many phrases that we use daily without even thinking about them, such as "What's up?" and "Let's hang out."


11. Our bathroom stalls lack privacy.
Using the toilet in a public restroom in America is a risky endeavor. With toilets low to the ground and large gaps in between the walls and door, American public toilets can leave one yearning for just a little more privacy.

12. Businesses spend tons of money on warnings and waivers.
Because people are so quick to sue each other in the United States, product labels are covered with warnings and people have to sign waivers to do the simplest things.

13. We also put pickles on stuff.
Americans love to put pickles on everything. And why not? They are tasty, salty, vinegary, and go well with everything! It is not as common to put pickles on every sandwich—and every plate containing a sandwich—in other countries.

14. Sales taxes are added to the bill at the end of the transaction.
In America, sales taxes are calculated only when all of the items are rung up. In most other countries, the tax price is already figured into the goods. So if you see something on the shelf priced at 2 euros, that's how much you will pay at the register. This is a constant frustration for non-Americans whenever they attempt to purchase anything in the United States.

15. Americans eat at "odd" times.
In America, lunch is traditionally served at noon, and dinner is around 6:30 in the evening. Dinner in some European countries isn't served until as late as 9:00 p.m.

16. Lawyers advertise their services.
Regardless of whether the reputation is deserved, lawyers in America are often stereotyped. Advertisements on television, the internet, and print media paint a picture of assertive ambulance chasers who convince people they're needed, rather than the other way around.

17. We train our children to say the Pledge of Allegiance.
Americans children start saying the pledge in kindergarten and often continue to recite it daily throughout primary school. To people from other countries, seeing a bunch of children mindlessly pledging allegiance to a flag is a little...well, creepy.

18. We celebrate 'merica with almost rabid enthusiasm.
Our flag is on shirts, hats, cups, mugs—everywhere. You can't turn around without seeing a flag or two, especially around one of our many national holidays. People from other countries find this to be just a bit much.
charisstoma: (default)
I want Jon Stewart's dialog of the descriptions of the types of Bullshit that he gave close to the end of his last show.




1. example was something about you don't label a thing with 'let us do this because you are afraid so of course you give us the right to listen in/read your phone calls and texts'. Instead you label it 'The Patriot Act'.

2. Bury it under a lot of Bullshit and by the time you've dug the thing out to look at you don't care.

3. Link it with a lot of other things that have no connection at all to the Bullshit. Sort of a cluster of Bullshit.



His parting monologue was about detecting B.S. around us.

The “best defense” against the substance, Stewart said, “is vigilance. So if you smell something, say something.”


http://www.mcall.com/entertainment/ct-jon-stewart-daily-show-final-review-20150806-column.html#page=1
charisstoma: (default)
Or the kids just saw the movie, is this for protection from Cruella DeVille?

charisstoma: (default)

Proud parent of a 3rd grader?
Product of homeschooling?

It's hot here. Heat has addled the seller's brain.
charisstoma: (default)

It's not just the reading that does it. You can get this from writing one too. I am a Bookaholic.
charisstoma: (default)
20 Jokes So Terrible They're Actually Funny.
http://www.tickld.com/x/20-jokes-so-terrible-theyre-actually-funny?utm_source=tickld&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=terriblejokes&ts_pid=2&ts_pid=2
1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"

"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."

"Is it common?"

Well, "It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."

"I don't believe you," says Dolly.

"It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut off your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says "Dam!"

16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

18. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good...) A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

20. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did!!!!!!!!
charisstoma: (default)


At first glance I thought these were giant caterpillars that had attacked him. Nope.

This is when you find out how much people really like you/ how professional the paramedics are/ why you don't play with cactus.
charisstoma: (default)
This may be cruel and unusual punishment to tell the guy to roll over onto his stomach afterwards.



Americans like to do things a little bit bigger and better and this cop from Austin, Texas took it a little bit too far when he decided it was a good idea to taser someone’s penis.

After trying and failing to chase after the naked man, the officer resorted to the only thing he had left to take the perp down – his taser – and aimed it at his penis. And tasered it. Hard.

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