Lawyer: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people? Witness: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Lawyer: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? Witness: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. Lawyer: And Mr. Johnson was dead at the time? Witness: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
The next day the testimony of the doctor continued. (same lawyer)
Lawyer: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? Witness: No. Lawyer: Did you check for blood pressure? Witness: No. Lawyer: Did you check for breathing? Witness: No. Lawyer: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? Witness: No. Lawyer: How can you be so sure, Doctor? Witness: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Lawyer: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless? Witness: It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
OR this could be the reason for the question on that health insurance form: Lawyer: How was your first marriage terminated? Witness: By death. Lawyer: And by whose death was it terminated?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2016-05-03 06:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-05-03 01:17 pm (UTC)Lawyer: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
Witness: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Lawyer: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
Witness: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Lawyer: And Mr. Johnson was dead at the time?
Witness: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
The next day the testimony of the doctor continued. (same lawyer)
Lawyer: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Witness: No.
Lawyer: Did you check for blood pressure?
Witness: No.
Lawyer: Did you check for breathing?
Witness: No.
Lawyer: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
Witness: No.
Lawyer: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
Witness: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Lawyer: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
Witness: It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
OR this could be the reason for the question on that health insurance form:
Lawyer: How was your first marriage terminated?
Witness: By death.
Lawyer: And by whose death was it terminated?
no subject
Date: 2016-05-03 04:06 pm (UTC)