![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
charisstomaSo many apologies to the Brothers Grimm and Disney.
Title: The Setting (m/m, fairytale, PG) Parts 1 through 3
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 100
River’s brothers talked of nothing but Prince Elkhart’s quest for his future consort and his trying all likely candidates. ‘It was a hard task the Prince had’ was often repeated in River’s hearing with fond laughter at his blushes.
Finished scrubbing the entry yet again, River stretched hoping that this time the floor would stay clean until it dried. Of course it didn’t, as the muddy booted Royal retinue arrived.
Bent over regarding what was left of the once pristine floor, River silently cursed his brothers’ plotting, as the Prince tried him on for size and found him just right.
Part 2
Word count: 100
Riding side-saddle in front of the Prince, River voiced his thoughts, “It’s not as if you’ll get any little princes or princesses out of me.”
Elkhart smiled pointing at himself, “fifth son of the King. My brothers will all be grateful of our non-production of heirs.”
“But we don’t even know each other,” River found himself whining.
“Again not a problem, your brothers sent in a resume with your likes, dislikes, accomplishments and,” Elkhart smirked, “your faults. We’ll have a long discrete engagement but I believe you might come to like me too. What’s not to like.”
River sighed, “modesty?”
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~
Part 3
Word count: 1411
?!Thwax encouraged me!?
It wasn’t as if Elkhart didn’t do things properly, River thought; there were the introductions to the parents and the obligatory chaste kiss on the lips which was really too bizarre since the Prince hadn’t been shy on their first fucking meeting. Then again, Elkhart was trying for discrete until they were officially a couple.
River was shown to his room conveniently near the Prince’s bed chamber. There was a discrete knocking on his door and a pompous little man with clipboard in hand entered.
“Prince Elkhart’s possible intended consort?” A check was made when River nodded. “This will not do at all at all. Follow me please.”
On opening the door to another room, “This is the Straw Room. Note the spinning wheel. Have all this spun into gold by the morning,” and the little man left locking the door behind him.
River got it done and he was going to talk to his brothers about them spilling about that particular hobby of his, right after he told Elkhart that their possibly discrete engagement was off. He didn’t need to relocate to a palace to play househusband hobbyist. He’d get right onto doing that, he thought yawning, but first there was a bed calling his name.
It was a lumpy bed, he decided, marking off items on a mental clipboard of his own, with mentally narrowed eyes. Just let that little pompous Princely Personal Ass-istant … River fell asleep, lumpy bed or not and dreamed of Elkhart being indiscreetly familiar and his whiskers tickled and even if he did have a very nice tail, boots should not be worn in bed, lumpy bed or otherwise.
Waking up naked hadn’t been how River remembered going to bed; looking at himself in the large ornate mirror on the wall. There hadn’t been finger shaped bruises on his ass and thighs before either, surely he’d have noticed them, but that could be late blooming leftovers from his first meeting Elkhart. The mirror nicely pointed out the soft pillow on the chair for comfortable sitting purposes but it advised that it probably wouldn’t be terribly discrete to use it in the more public areas of the Palace and then further advised that he make use of the ewer of water to get rid of the cat lick in his hair.
Washed, dressed, and combed decent; River took himself to find his less than possible discretely secret future husband for the purpose of having 'a discussion'. First he was going to discuss, pre-spousal abuse of hobby employment, and lumpy beds, and persons of a possible cat persuasion who weren’t satisfied curling up on the bed such that it made it impossible for their bed partner to move at all during the night. River found he was really upset that Elkhart hadn’t even woken him up so they could share the fucking part of the night. Discretely possible engagements entailing getting to know each other should be done with both parties mentally aware of what the fuck was happening!, he thought, stomping down the hall and then more gingerly navigating the stairs. If there was a pillow in the breakfast room, it .. was .. his.
River opened the doors to the small breakfast room with a smile for one of the maids carrying in a tray of silver domed plates and found himself the brunt of interested smiles. Elkhart pulled out a chair for him, the table cloth discretely sliding across a plump hidden pillow upon the chair’s already cushioned seat.
“Did you find the bed comfortable, my dear,” asked the Queen.
River considered, “I’m sure that it was that it’s always difficult to sleep in a strange bed,” he started.
“Or sleep at all,” was mumbled by what must be one of Elkhart’s siblings. A well administered kick caused a politely emitted yelp, surprising River who had thought that a Queen would refrain and be more correctly well-mannered. His thought that perhaps Her Majesty hadn’t had her coffee yet was refuted by His Majesty lovingly refilling her cup and passing her the sugar bowl and creamer.
“You did use a prophylactic, my son, I hope,” His Majesty said looking at Elkhart sternly.
Elkhart reddened, “Sir,” and glanced for help from his mother.
“Don’t look to me for help on this one, my Hart,” said Her Majesty, “things can happen, especially in this family. If you don’t want the pitter patter of little paws on the stairs, then you pay attention to your father.”
River turned big eyes onto Elkhart and mouthed at him, ‘Say What?!’ Elkhart shrugged back at him but under the concealment of the tablecloth a hand found him and squeezed lightly, then stroked. River had a different worry now, that one or both of Their Majesties might rise to leave from the table making it necessary for River to do so too per good etiquette. It would be embarrassingly hard to do.
“I hear that you have nimble fingers, River,” continued Her Majesty. “I too was like that before my dear sweet husband deigned to marry me.” She took a sip from her cup, “Tell me, was Rumple at least courteous?”
Eyebrows flying into his hairline, River stammered, “That’s real? I thought that was just a fairytale.”
“Well you know how things can become distorted with the re-telling,” Her Majesty said archly, “Rumple didn’t really want Archibald if I couldn’t guess his name.” She took another sip and smiled wickedly, “No, he wanted employment here at the Palace, building up the Kingdom’s coffers. He has this thing for gold. It’s to hide our embarrassing family secrets but as Rumple likes to say,” the family intoned in unison, “There’s nothing like gold to overcome a bit of cattiness in the family bloodlines.” She smiled across the table at River, “he’ll leave off as soon as you start breeding.”
“But Your Majesty, I’m male,” River said flushing because really he had hard proof hidden right under the tablecloth.
His Majesty coughed, “Yes, um about that Hart. Now that you’ve been on a quest to find your love and found them …” He smiled, “didn’t think I’d look at that particular dog eared file River’s family sent you?” He waved down Elkhart’s, “SIR.”
“Well I did and shared it with your mother.”
His Majesty turned to River, “Who did your family have do that very nice candid portrait of you in what I can only assume was your bed?”
Oh Shit, River thought. “Sir, may I please borrow a few of your best guardsmen for a short trip home? I promise they will be only a tiny bit messy upon their return providing we surprise my brothers in the middle of the night while they’re sleeping. They’ll need for their swords to be especially sharp because I do love my brothers and wouldn’t want them to suffer more than the usual amount of pain on dying.”
Waving his hand, “No, no. Just the name of the portraitist. We’re thinking about offering Errol to one of the Elf King’s brood…”
Errol grinned interrupting, “Or all of the Elf King’s brood.”
“But I digress,” His Majesty said, “there is magic in this family, from various sources and,” he turned to Elkhart, “considering you’re already tupping your sweet ram here, if you don’t want to have small paws or hooves, be that as it may, running up and down the stairs before you’re both ready, you’ll sheath your sword in a preventative guard until you are ready. That’s all I’m going to say for now, other than I’m pleased my own father didn’t warn me when your mother and I ...”
“FATHER!” All five boys cried in utter mortification.
“Dearest,” Her Majesty put her hand over His Majesty’s, “I thought we weren’t going to tell the boys the tale about when a boy bee and a boy bee sting each other, yet.”
Five sets of eyes stared aghast at their parents. Because really; the cat in boots, the straw into gold, and that whole thing with the golden coach flying away before the striking of the clock at midnight; those were one thing but their mother had been/was what?? and they'd not been told about it until now!
River grinned and his hand crept over into Elkhart’s lap. Turn about distraction was only fair and he was going to love being part of this family but they needed a non-lumpy mattress and he was firm on that.
Title: The Setting (m/m, fairytale, PG) Parts 1 through 3
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 100
River’s brothers talked of nothing but Prince Elkhart’s quest for his future consort and his trying all likely candidates. ‘It was a hard task the Prince had’ was often repeated in River’s hearing with fond laughter at his blushes.
Finished scrubbing the entry yet again, River stretched hoping that this time the floor would stay clean until it dried. Of course it didn’t, as the muddy booted Royal retinue arrived.
Bent over regarding what was left of the once pristine floor, River silently cursed his brothers’ plotting, as the Prince tried him on for size and found him just right.
Part 2
Word count: 100
Riding side-saddle in front of the Prince, River voiced his thoughts, “It’s not as if you’ll get any little princes or princesses out of me.”
Elkhart smiled pointing at himself, “fifth son of the King. My brothers will all be grateful of our non-production of heirs.”
“But we don’t even know each other,” River found himself whining.
“Again not a problem, your brothers sent in a resume with your likes, dislikes, accomplishments and,” Elkhart smirked, “your faults. We’ll have a long discrete engagement but I believe you might come to like me too. What’s not to like.”
River sighed, “modesty?”
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~
Part 3
Word count: 1411
?!Thwax encouraged me!?
It wasn’t as if Elkhart didn’t do things properly, River thought; there were the introductions to the parents and the obligatory chaste kiss on the lips which was really too bizarre since the Prince hadn’t been shy on their first fucking meeting. Then again, Elkhart was trying for discrete until they were officially a couple.
River was shown to his room conveniently near the Prince’s bed chamber. There was a discrete knocking on his door and a pompous little man with clipboard in hand entered.
“Prince Elkhart’s possible intended consort?” A check was made when River nodded. “This will not do at all at all. Follow me please.”
On opening the door to another room, “This is the Straw Room. Note the spinning wheel. Have all this spun into gold by the morning,” and the little man left locking the door behind him.
River got it done and he was going to talk to his brothers about them spilling about that particular hobby of his, right after he told Elkhart that their possibly discrete engagement was off. He didn’t need to relocate to a palace to play househusband hobbyist. He’d get right onto doing that, he thought yawning, but first there was a bed calling his name.
It was a lumpy bed, he decided, marking off items on a mental clipboard of his own, with mentally narrowed eyes. Just let that little pompous Princely Personal Ass-istant … River fell asleep, lumpy bed or not and dreamed of Elkhart being indiscreetly familiar and his whiskers tickled and even if he did have a very nice tail, boots should not be worn in bed, lumpy bed or otherwise.
Waking up naked hadn’t been how River remembered going to bed; looking at himself in the large ornate mirror on the wall. There hadn’t been finger shaped bruises on his ass and thighs before either, surely he’d have noticed them, but that could be late blooming leftovers from his first meeting Elkhart. The mirror nicely pointed out the soft pillow on the chair for comfortable sitting purposes but it advised that it probably wouldn’t be terribly discrete to use it in the more public areas of the Palace and then further advised that he make use of the ewer of water to get rid of the cat lick in his hair.
Washed, dressed, and combed decent; River took himself to find his less than possible discretely secret future husband for the purpose of having 'a discussion'. First he was going to discuss, pre-spousal abuse of hobby employment, and lumpy beds, and persons of a possible cat persuasion who weren’t satisfied curling up on the bed such that it made it impossible for their bed partner to move at all during the night. River found he was really upset that Elkhart hadn’t even woken him up so they could share the fucking part of the night. Discretely possible engagements entailing getting to know each other should be done with both parties mentally aware of what the fuck was happening!, he thought, stomping down the hall and then more gingerly navigating the stairs. If there was a pillow in the breakfast room, it .. was .. his.
River opened the doors to the small breakfast room with a smile for one of the maids carrying in a tray of silver domed plates and found himself the brunt of interested smiles. Elkhart pulled out a chair for him, the table cloth discretely sliding across a plump hidden pillow upon the chair’s already cushioned seat.
“Did you find the bed comfortable, my dear,” asked the Queen.
River considered, “I’m sure that it was that it’s always difficult to sleep in a strange bed,” he started.
“Or sleep at all,” was mumbled by what must be one of Elkhart’s siblings. A well administered kick caused a politely emitted yelp, surprising River who had thought that a Queen would refrain and be more correctly well-mannered. His thought that perhaps Her Majesty hadn’t had her coffee yet was refuted by His Majesty lovingly refilling her cup and passing her the sugar bowl and creamer.
“You did use a prophylactic, my son, I hope,” His Majesty said looking at Elkhart sternly.
Elkhart reddened, “Sir,” and glanced for help from his mother.
“Don’t look to me for help on this one, my Hart,” said Her Majesty, “things can happen, especially in this family. If you don’t want the pitter patter of little paws on the stairs, then you pay attention to your father.”
River turned big eyes onto Elkhart and mouthed at him, ‘Say What?!’ Elkhart shrugged back at him but under the concealment of the tablecloth a hand found him and squeezed lightly, then stroked. River had a different worry now, that one or both of Their Majesties might rise to leave from the table making it necessary for River to do so too per good etiquette. It would be embarrassingly hard to do.
“I hear that you have nimble fingers, River,” continued Her Majesty. “I too was like that before my dear sweet husband deigned to marry me.” She took a sip from her cup, “Tell me, was Rumple at least courteous?”
Eyebrows flying into his hairline, River stammered, “That’s real? I thought that was just a fairytale.”
“Well you know how things can become distorted with the re-telling,” Her Majesty said archly, “Rumple didn’t really want Archibald if I couldn’t guess his name.” She took another sip and smiled wickedly, “No, he wanted employment here at the Palace, building up the Kingdom’s coffers. He has this thing for gold. It’s to hide our embarrassing family secrets but as Rumple likes to say,” the family intoned in unison, “There’s nothing like gold to overcome a bit of cattiness in the family bloodlines.” She smiled across the table at River, “he’ll leave off as soon as you start breeding.”
“But Your Majesty, I’m male,” River said flushing because really he had hard proof hidden right under the tablecloth.
His Majesty coughed, “Yes, um about that Hart. Now that you’ve been on a quest to find your love and found them …” He smiled, “didn’t think I’d look at that particular dog eared file River’s family sent you?” He waved down Elkhart’s, “SIR.”
“Well I did and shared it with your mother.”
His Majesty turned to River, “Who did your family have do that very nice candid portrait of you in what I can only assume was your bed?”
Oh Shit, River thought. “Sir, may I please borrow a few of your best guardsmen for a short trip home? I promise they will be only a tiny bit messy upon their return providing we surprise my brothers in the middle of the night while they’re sleeping. They’ll need for their swords to be especially sharp because I do love my brothers and wouldn’t want them to suffer more than the usual amount of pain on dying.”
Waving his hand, “No, no. Just the name of the portraitist. We’re thinking about offering Errol to one of the Elf King’s brood…”
Errol grinned interrupting, “Or all of the Elf King’s brood.”
“But I digress,” His Majesty said, “there is magic in this family, from various sources and,” he turned to Elkhart, “considering you’re already tupping your sweet ram here, if you don’t want to have small paws or hooves, be that as it may, running up and down the stairs before you’re both ready, you’ll sheath your sword in a preventative guard until you are ready. That’s all I’m going to say for now, other than I’m pleased my own father didn’t warn me when your mother and I ...”
“FATHER!” All five boys cried in utter mortification.
“Dearest,” Her Majesty put her hand over His Majesty’s, “I thought we weren’t going to tell the boys the tale about when a boy bee and a boy bee sting each other, yet.”
Five sets of eyes stared aghast at their parents. Because really; the cat in boots, the straw into gold, and that whole thing with the golden coach flying away before the striking of the clock at midnight; those were one thing but their mother had been/was what?? and they'd not been told about it until now!
River grinned and his hand crept over into Elkhart’s lap. Turn about distraction was only fair and he was going to love being part of this family but they needed a non-lumpy mattress and he was firm on that.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2014-08-28 04:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-08-28 10:41 pm (UTC)Fairytales are surprisingly fun to do.
no subject
Date: 2014-08-28 11:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-08-29 02:38 am (UTC)But part three was so over the top that I stopped taking it seriously. If his family didn't bother telling Elkhart about the precautions until now, they want the patter of little feet. How did he not hear about this when his old brothers paired off? Or his the youngest the first to find a mate?