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Jan. 8th, 2017 11:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
charisstomaBlame dyoklako and probably Meridae, my ninja fiction-est, and Sherlock
Title: The Unsuspecting Consultant
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 675
Someplace it lurked. Henry knew he was here. Lurking.
“You need to get over yourself, you know.”
“And you think this why?”
“You’re twitchy, ‘Sherlock’.”
“Something you know?”
“Maybe.”
“Ha. I don’t think so.” Henry opened a drawer in the desk. At the bottom of it a package was lying, innocently, with a small beige envelope sticking out from under the ribbon where the red bow was centered.
“Open it.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Well if you won’t then I will,” George reached into the drawer, pulling out the gaily wrapped package and put it on the desk top. “Shall I read the card first? Yes,” he answered himself and plucked the envelope up, pulling the card out and turning it over to read the neat printing. He started, dropping the card.
“Still want to open it, George?”
“Fucking? What? You knew?”
“Message is different each time and I didn’t know where.”
Why would he say that to you, if he’s your friend? And it smells awful.”
Henry looked at him like he was a half-wit. “Stink? Because he’s rotten?” Then he shrugged, “doesn’t matter. No really, though if I had to hazard a guess …” he grimaced. “No! Don’t. Don’t open it!”
“Well someone has to,” George took hold of the wrapping, ripping it open. He gasped, “It’s an onion.”
Sighing heavily Henry said, “Yes. A ninja onion. We take turns. It was his turn this time.”
“But it smells awful.”
“Actually it’s a he, an onion shifter. We’re onion shifters. You’ve got your finger up,” Henry inspected the onion, but not too closely, in George’s hand, “if you’d move your thumb a bit to the left you’d be very deep into him.” Henry grinned, “I think he likes you. He’s beginning to drip.”
“Since you found him, George ...” Henry edged toward the door, “shower is over there. Don’t worry Lee will show you the way. He needs one … badly and you both will after he’s done with you.”
“What?”
“I have a feeling Lee will add you to his list for Ninja Stalking. Welcome,” he smiled, “I’ll just leave the two of you to it.”
The door snapped shut and the onion grew in size developing arms, legs and a head with wide smile.
“Hello you. So I’m Lee and I need to shower. Do come with me, you can scrub my back and I’ll scrub yours. Turnabout is fair play after all and I do believe if I let you out of my sight you’ll try leaving. Henry probably locked the door anyway. He’s such a romantic.”
Considering he was dreaming, George went along with it, believing that he’d wake up hard and aching, probably before getting to come, in his own bed.
The sun on his face woke him. George sighed, stretching, a smile on his face because as a dream it had been better than good. Then he stilled as an arm snaked around his waist and a naked body fitted itself behind him with evident hard interest.
“Good morning. Ready for a great way to start the day? I am,” Lee nuzzled.
“Um. Okay. But first, just to satisfy my curiosity, I’m not going to catch anything from you like onion-ness and you don’t have sex with Henry, do you?”
“Not usually to either of those things, though if you want to try a three-way with Henry I could probably talk him into it. Want me to ask him?”
“Maybe … sometime. You were saying….”
“Of course love, let’s get my sprout up your ass.”
George moaned, clenching down and shifted his ass a bit to the left to help Lee find the right place, then grinned as Lee gave his own moan. His grin faded as Lee seemed to grow inside him.
“What’s happening?”
A kiss was planted at the base of George’s neck, “Don’t worry. That’s my bulb. You’re going to loooove this. Once you’ve had an onion bulb you, you won’t want anything else … unless you’re into real pain and want a ginger.”
Title: The Unsuspecting Consultant
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 675
Someplace it lurked. Henry knew he was here. Lurking.
“You need to get over yourself, you know.”
“And you think this why?”
“You’re twitchy, ‘Sherlock’.”
“Something you know?”
“Maybe.”
“Ha. I don’t think so.” Henry opened a drawer in the desk. At the bottom of it a package was lying, innocently, with a small beige envelope sticking out from under the ribbon where the red bow was centered.
“Open it.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Well if you won’t then I will,” George reached into the drawer, pulling out the gaily wrapped package and put it on the desk top. “Shall I read the card first? Yes,” he answered himself and plucked the envelope up, pulling the card out and turning it over to read the neat printing. He started, dropping the card.
“Still want to open it, George?”
“Fucking? What? You knew?”
“Message is different each time and I didn’t know where.”
Why would he say that to you, if he’s your friend? And it smells awful.”
Henry looked at him like he was a half-wit. “Stink? Because he’s rotten?” Then he shrugged, “doesn’t matter. No really, though if I had to hazard a guess …” he grimaced. “No! Don’t. Don’t open it!”
“Well someone has to,” George took hold of the wrapping, ripping it open. He gasped, “It’s an onion.”
Sighing heavily Henry said, “Yes. A ninja onion. We take turns. It was his turn this time.”
“But it smells awful.”
“Actually it’s a he, an onion shifter. We’re onion shifters. You’ve got your finger up,” Henry inspected the onion, but not too closely, in George’s hand, “if you’d move your thumb a bit to the left you’d be very deep into him.” Henry grinned, “I think he likes you. He’s beginning to drip.”
“Since you found him, George ...” Henry edged toward the door, “shower is over there. Don’t worry Lee will show you the way. He needs one … badly and you both will after he’s done with you.”
“What?”
“I have a feeling Lee will add you to his list for Ninja Stalking. Welcome,” he smiled, “I’ll just leave the two of you to it.”
The door snapped shut and the onion grew in size developing arms, legs and a head with wide smile.
“Hello you. So I’m Lee and I need to shower. Do come with me, you can scrub my back and I’ll scrub yours. Turnabout is fair play after all and I do believe if I let you out of my sight you’ll try leaving. Henry probably locked the door anyway. He’s such a romantic.”
Considering he was dreaming, George went along with it, believing that he’d wake up hard and aching, probably before getting to come, in his own bed.
The sun on his face woke him. George sighed, stretching, a smile on his face because as a dream it had been better than good. Then he stilled as an arm snaked around his waist and a naked body fitted itself behind him with evident hard interest.
“Good morning. Ready for a great way to start the day? I am,” Lee nuzzled.
“Um. Okay. But first, just to satisfy my curiosity, I’m not going to catch anything from you like onion-ness and you don’t have sex with Henry, do you?”
“Not usually to either of those things, though if you want to try a three-way with Henry I could probably talk him into it. Want me to ask him?”
“Maybe … sometime. You were saying….”
“Of course love, let’s get my sprout up your ass.”
George moaned, clenching down and shifted his ass a bit to the left to help Lee find the right place, then grinned as Lee gave his own moan. His grin faded as Lee seemed to grow inside him.
“What’s happening?”
A kiss was planted at the base of George’s neck, “Don’t worry. That’s my bulb. You’re going to loooove this. Once you’ve had an onion bulb you, you won’t want anything else … unless you’re into real pain and want a ginger.”
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no subject
Date: 2017-01-09 09:55 am (UTC)(Shh, you muddled the names just after George and Lee locked themselves in the bathroom).
You know, garlic shifters might have a use if they lived in a country filled with vampires - it would be a survival mechanism.
no subject
Date: 2017-01-09 03:52 pm (UTC)All corrected and thank you.
Now that's an idea with the concept of garlic shifters and vampires.
Could be deadly for the vampires though, so a real Romeo doesn't eat Julian. Though he could fuck him.
It was incredibly difficult to porn this. Might have something to do with I was watching the new season's 2nd episode of Sherlock.
Waiting to see what dyoklako thinks of this.
no subject
Date: 2017-01-09 06:49 pm (UTC)Maybe an onion shifter can stir a sauce with his um finger and give just a hint of onion or turn regular table salt into onion salt.. same thing with onion powder but maybe just a nice buffing of skin cells is how onion powder is made and we're not going to talk about bottled onion juice.
no subject
Date: 2017-01-09 10:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-10 01:39 am (UTC)NINJA ONION STRIKES AGAIN!
It's soooooo goooood! XD
Thank you~! XD
p.s.
*whispers*canwegetthatthreesomesoonest*whispers*
*cackles and runs away and hides*
no subject
Date: 2017-01-10 06:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-10 06:10 am (UTC)Did you catch all the honorable mentions?
I was watching Sherlock while writing this.
There was even a hint of werewolf fiction in there so it would have some bite to it.
*running away*
no subject
Date: 2017-01-10 08:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 02:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 02:52 am (UTC)*runs away and hides*
no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 04:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 04:18 am (UTC)Think about it though, 2 onion shifters
no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 06:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 07:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-01-12 07:06 am (UTC)Pariah
Date: 2017-01-13 05:06 am (UTC)Have got warmth back in my nose, hands and feet but my throat is raw unless I gargle. Advil is keeping my fever down but when it gets close.... 98.6 is normal for most people. I usually run at 97.6. I'm at 98.8 with the Advil.
Head aches and I'm coughing.
Ex hubby had this from before Christmas and he still had a light cough when he left this last Tuesday after staying with us for overnight.
Was out sick today. Have sent in my absence from work tomorrow already.
Re: Pariah
Date: 2017-01-16 02:21 am (UTC)rest when you can and may you be able to have that much needed rest this weekend.
feel better soonest. who knows, writing the fic may help get you better the soonest time possible?
*nudgewinknugdesmile*
*cackles and runs away to hide*
Re: Pariah
Date: 2017-01-16 05:14 am (UTC)