charisstoma (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
charisstoma) wrote2012-08-23 08:49 pm
charisstoma) wrote2012-08-23 08:49 pm
Entry tags:
Less Than Three Press : Samantha's Challenge #10 "Just get in the car."
Title: Onodrim http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Ents
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 455
My thanks to dyoklako for the marvelous way to substitute food for swear words and to saskia for bringing Tolkien characters to hover in my mind. And of course, Dictionary.com for K.M. Frontain’s quote and rykaine for the prompts.
***
He moved toward the bole eagerly. The tree was shorter than it was wide, the branches enormous appendages that flung to the sides in a giant welcome.
-- K.M. Frontain, The Gryphon Taint
Karl, for the third time, read the quote. Looking up, he compared the description with what was up on the knoll in front of him.
“Well hasenpfeffer,” he swore. “It’s the same rabbit stew thing.”
Laughter interrupted him, “You know you should put your ladle down, sweet cheeks,” Karl knew which cheeks Norm was referring to and they didn’t get chapped in winter unless a certain someone had stuck snow into unfortunate places.
“You should put your ladle down and swear like the educated man you are.” Norm grinned at him, “The way I taught you.”
“Yeah, you taught me alright, late at night, early in the morning, and any time we could steal a few dozen hours away from interruption; but it wasn’t any way that my mother would have approved of without a wedding ring.”
“Do you want that wedding ring?”
With a growl, “You know I do, cucumber.” There was another growl.
Norm from the comfort of leaning on the car pushed away. “Good. Now get in the car.”
“Where’s my professions of your love for me? Where’s my formal request for my hand from you? Where’s my sautéing kiss for cranberries sake?” Karl demanded. The growl was louder.
“They’re in the tree’s moving car, for move your sweet buns sakes! Now. Get. In. The car!”
The latest growl was followed by a rattling of branches and Karl throwing a glance up the hill, but less far than when he’d first looked at it, saw that the tree definitely was moving, towards him. A very short struggle with his mind later, he did what sane people did confronted with a rapidly moving tree and ran for the car.
Norm had the engine started and the passenger door open. As soon as Karl could throw himself inside and not lose any limbs from the door slamming shut, the car was down the road piling miles of protection between them and a Tolkien depiction of myth.
“MacBeth has nothing on us,” Norm said and nervous laughter filled the car.
“So did you mean it or was it all a ploy?”
Norm looked offended. “You think I would bring you to a place and arrange for a killer fairy tale tree to come alive to try to get you, all to set a romantic mood to propose?”
With a huff Karl crossed his arms over his chest and glowered at the windscreen. “Well it would have been nice.”
“Yes my crazy love, but what will better is crossing the border and tying the knot over the anvil at Gretna. Your copy of the marriage notice declaration form for the Registrar is in the glove box. You’ve got about 50 miles and closing to fill it out.”
Author: charisstoma
Word count: 455
My thanks to dyoklako for the marvelous way to substitute food for swear words and to saskia for bringing Tolkien characters to hover in my mind. And of course, Dictionary.com for K.M. Frontain’s quote and rykaine for the prompts.
He moved toward the bole eagerly. The tree was shorter than it was wide, the branches enormous appendages that flung to the sides in a giant welcome.
-- K.M. Frontain, The Gryphon Taint
Karl, for the third time, read the quote. Looking up, he compared the description with what was up on the knoll in front of him.
“Well hasenpfeffer,” he swore. “It’s the same rabbit stew thing.”
Laughter interrupted him, “You know you should put your ladle down, sweet cheeks,” Karl knew which cheeks Norm was referring to and they didn’t get chapped in winter unless a certain someone had stuck snow into unfortunate places.
“You should put your ladle down and swear like the educated man you are.” Norm grinned at him, “The way I taught you.”
“Yeah, you taught me alright, late at night, early in the morning, and any time we could steal a few dozen hours away from interruption; but it wasn’t any way that my mother would have approved of without a wedding ring.”
“Do you want that wedding ring?”
With a growl, “You know I do, cucumber.” There was another growl.
Norm from the comfort of leaning on the car pushed away. “Good. Now get in the car.”
“Where’s my professions of your love for me? Where’s my formal request for my hand from you? Where’s my sautéing kiss for cranberries sake?” Karl demanded. The growl was louder.
“They’re in the tree’s moving car, for move your sweet buns sakes! Now. Get. In. The car!”
The latest growl was followed by a rattling of branches and Karl throwing a glance up the hill, but less far than when he’d first looked at it, saw that the tree definitely was moving, towards him. A very short struggle with his mind later, he did what sane people did confronted with a rapidly moving tree and ran for the car.
Norm had the engine started and the passenger door open. As soon as Karl could throw himself inside and not lose any limbs from the door slamming shut, the car was down the road piling miles of protection between them and a Tolkien depiction of myth.
“MacBeth has nothing on us,” Norm said and nervous laughter filled the car.
“So did you mean it or was it all a ploy?”
Norm looked offended. “You think I would bring you to a place and arrange for a killer fairy tale tree to come alive to try to get you, all to set a romantic mood to propose?”
With a huff Karl crossed his arms over his chest and glowered at the windscreen. “Well it would have been nice.”
“Yes my crazy love, but what will better is crossing the border and tying the knot over the anvil at Gretna. Your copy of the marriage notice declaration form for the Registrar is in the glove box. You’ve got about 50 miles and closing to fill it out.”
no subject
Love this and only realized the Ents only after reading the comments. yeah, been a long time since i've read LotR (though i watched the movie only last week on cable).
my food swears are inspired due to my local language's love of playing with words hence the lovely desserts selection. ^^;;
no subject
And since I think that your ranting is perfectly justified that would make those as 'just desserts' ?
no subject