charisstoma (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
charisstoma) wrote2011-03-27 02:53 pm
charisstoma) wrote2011-03-27 02:53 pm
Entry tags:
Shopping
I wanted to be able to write a Sunday Snuggle but my mush for mind did not have one in stock. It had this instead. I think it's a clear case of bait and switch. It does take place in Pleasures and it does have a dwarf.
Title: Shopping
Author: charisstoma
Rating: R
Summary: Pleasures Coffee Shop ‘Verse courtesy of theotherdibbler. Blame for this- mee_eep who demanded Pleasures with a twist of dwarf. Theskimblishone is responsible for the salesperson‘s name. *grins*
‘The customer is always right’ is wrong. Neither should one bend over in all instances to please a customer. Yet I have the feeling that this is just what has happened.
Word count: 922
Steve, no not that Steve a different one, was watching the door for the next set of customers. They usually came into Pleasures as a set, as in more than one. Rarely did only one customer arrive by himself unless he or she thought that they were just entering a deluxe coffee shop. Steve had to admit the coffees were gourmet quality, leaving nothing to desire except perhaps another one, but the rest of the shop was all about inspiring desire. The imagination boggled as to who thought up all the various sex toys that the shop displayed and sold. Customers could order a coffee with food delicacies and then order a tray of whichever of their theme sex toys they wanted to look over. The waitperson would bring their order and inquire which of the trays were desired, bringing that back to fully describe the attributes of each item for the patron. Steve had to remind himself and patrons occasionally that the waitperson was not one of the available items on the menu.
Monday mid-mornings were low traffic times. Most people were tucked in at their jobs and the ones that weren’t tended to be individuals who knew what they wanted and didn’t need to sit at a table to peruse the merchandise. More than one would walk in, order a coffee of some sort, then ask for such and such an item, pay, and then walk right back out. Steve just needed to keep the coffee available and wipe down the counter. He had lots of time to play over scenarios in his mind. The latest were having to do with how to handle an irate customer of the sort that the company was sending out notices about. Steve thought that it must be all a joke. April 1st ‘was’ in the coming week.
The bulletins had directed that certain of the dildo merchandize were not to be referred to as any specific mythical species until further notice. Supposedly, there’d been incidences of complaint regarding the Dibbler Dildo range, notably those informally described as having vampire and troll attributes.
In his mind, Steve was playing, ‘So a dwarf, a fairy, or an elf, comes into the shop…’ when the bell announced the arrival of customers. He took a quick swipe with an immaculate cloth to the counter expecting to see a person in front of him and looking up gave the standard greeting welcoming the visitor to Pleasures with a practiced smile. His, “how may I be of service?” extended into, “could I show you to a table?” when he saw the three other individuals who’d entered as well.
By contrast, the one individual was dressed casually in dark dress pants and a simple button up shirt and tie that he‘d flipped the length of over his shoulder. He might have been some missionary boy come to spread the gospel or some office lower level and seemed nervous to be in the company of the others. The men with him were not so normal. ‘A dwarf, a fairy, and an elf walked into a shop’ was the best description but.. they were dressed in suits. All Steve could say was that if it weren’t excellent costume makeup then he was faced with the real thing and he really wished that he wasn’t the only one on hand in the store.
*******
When Jenny and Frank came into the store they found the shop empty. Nothing was out of place. Nothing was missing.. Except Steve. Everything else was as it should be, coffee brewed, countertop and tables as perfect as they should be.
******
Francis looked up as the bell announced the arrival of customers. Monday mornings were so dead. She greeted the five people who walked in; two nervous young men in nice pants, button down shirts and ties with the long ends looped back over their shoulders and three men, subconsciously she doubted that, in suits. “Good morning. Welcome to Pleasures. How may I help you, Would you like to be seated at a table?”
A disgruntled look passed over the face of the taller blond customer. “Female.” was sighed. The five all turned and left back through the door. As they did Francis noticed the ties had loops at the ends as they trailed down the backs of the young men and that hands reached for them as they went through the door.
As the door closed, Eric came out of the backroom carrying a box of a new item from the Dibbler Dildo stock. Pressing a kiss to her cheek, “thanks for watching the counter while I got this lot checked in and ready for sale. I really appreciate your coming in. Scamper off now and enjoy the rest of your day off.” Glancing around the shop, “Thought I heard the bell. Just shoppers?”
Returning the hug a little more heart felt than normal, Francis nodded her head. Picking up the recent FAX from the company, she looked at the picture that had been taken by a security camera a week ago at another Pleasures Coffee Shop. The same four individuals; a dwarf, a fairy, an elf, and a young human male. At the bottom was a better photo of the fifth person, Steve Walker, staff person of Pleasures Coffee House #145. “Yeah. Shoppers.” Numbly Francis hugged Eric again, “I think, I‘ll stay for a while.”
******
Company FAX:
Effective immediately.
Due to conditions, there will be at least two staff members on duty during all open hours.
Continues here Shopping part 2
Title: Shopping
Author: charisstoma
Rating: R
Summary: Pleasures Coffee Shop ‘Verse courtesy of theotherdibbler. Blame for this- mee_eep who demanded Pleasures with a twist of dwarf. Theskimblishone is responsible for the salesperson‘s name. *grins*
‘The customer is always right’ is wrong. Neither should one bend over in all instances to please a customer. Yet I have the feeling that this is just what has happened.
Word count: 922
Steve, no not that Steve a different one, was watching the door for the next set of customers. They usually came into Pleasures as a set, as in more than one. Rarely did only one customer arrive by himself unless he or she thought that they were just entering a deluxe coffee shop. Steve had to admit the coffees were gourmet quality, leaving nothing to desire except perhaps another one, but the rest of the shop was all about inspiring desire. The imagination boggled as to who thought up all the various sex toys that the shop displayed and sold. Customers could order a coffee with food delicacies and then order a tray of whichever of their theme sex toys they wanted to look over. The waitperson would bring their order and inquire which of the trays were desired, bringing that back to fully describe the attributes of each item for the patron. Steve had to remind himself and patrons occasionally that the waitperson was not one of the available items on the menu.
Monday mid-mornings were low traffic times. Most people were tucked in at their jobs and the ones that weren’t tended to be individuals who knew what they wanted and didn’t need to sit at a table to peruse the merchandise. More than one would walk in, order a coffee of some sort, then ask for such and such an item, pay, and then walk right back out. Steve just needed to keep the coffee available and wipe down the counter. He had lots of time to play over scenarios in his mind. The latest were having to do with how to handle an irate customer of the sort that the company was sending out notices about. Steve thought that it must be all a joke. April 1st ‘was’ in the coming week.
The bulletins had directed that certain of the dildo merchandize were not to be referred to as any specific mythical species until further notice. Supposedly, there’d been incidences of complaint regarding the Dibbler Dildo range, notably those informally described as having vampire and troll attributes.
In his mind, Steve was playing, ‘So a dwarf, a fairy, or an elf, comes into the shop…’ when the bell announced the arrival of customers. He took a quick swipe with an immaculate cloth to the counter expecting to see a person in front of him and looking up gave the standard greeting welcoming the visitor to Pleasures with a practiced smile. His, “how may I be of service?” extended into, “could I show you to a table?” when he saw the three other individuals who’d entered as well.
By contrast, the one individual was dressed casually in dark dress pants and a simple button up shirt and tie that he‘d flipped the length of over his shoulder. He might have been some missionary boy come to spread the gospel or some office lower level and seemed nervous to be in the company of the others. The men with him were not so normal. ‘A dwarf, a fairy, and an elf walked into a shop’ was the best description but.. they were dressed in suits. All Steve could say was that if it weren’t excellent costume makeup then he was faced with the real thing and he really wished that he wasn’t the only one on hand in the store.
*******
When Jenny and Frank came into the store they found the shop empty. Nothing was out of place. Nothing was missing.. Except Steve. Everything else was as it should be, coffee brewed, countertop and tables as perfect as they should be.
******
Francis looked up as the bell announced the arrival of customers. Monday mornings were so dead. She greeted the five people who walked in; two nervous young men in nice pants, button down shirts and ties with the long ends looped back over their shoulders and three men, subconsciously she doubted that, in suits. “Good morning. Welcome to Pleasures. How may I help you, Would you like to be seated at a table?”
A disgruntled look passed over the face of the taller blond customer. “Female.” was sighed. The five all turned and left back through the door. As they did Francis noticed the ties had loops at the ends as they trailed down the backs of the young men and that hands reached for them as they went through the door.
As the door closed, Eric came out of the backroom carrying a box of a new item from the Dibbler Dildo stock. Pressing a kiss to her cheek, “thanks for watching the counter while I got this lot checked in and ready for sale. I really appreciate your coming in. Scamper off now and enjoy the rest of your day off.” Glancing around the shop, “Thought I heard the bell. Just shoppers?”
Returning the hug a little more heart felt than normal, Francis nodded her head. Picking up the recent FAX from the company, she looked at the picture that had been taken by a security camera a week ago at another Pleasures Coffee Shop. The same four individuals; a dwarf, a fairy, an elf, and a young human male. At the bottom was a better photo of the fifth person, Steve Walker, staff person of Pleasures Coffee House #145. “Yeah. Shoppers.” Numbly Francis hugged Eric again, “I think, I‘ll stay for a while.”
******
Company FAX:
Effective immediately.
Due to conditions, there will be at least two staff members on duty during all open hours.
Continues here Shopping part 2
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Are they stealing them to get them pregnant? TEEEHEEE!!
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No, I believe they are pets. Note the leashes. If you're looking for just the right special kind of toy one goes to Pleasures Coffee House They have everything and isn't Eric glad he was in the backroom.
Added a FAX bulletin at the end. The company is now aware of the problem. When the existance of the Coffee House made it beyond the more secretive Djinn at Lustful Liaisons to the supernatural populous at large with the *coughs* Dibbler Dildo line controversy, the supernatural populous was of course going to start shopping there.
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And obviously someone needs to give the supernatural populace lessons in what is defined as 'merchandise' and what is not.
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*snicker*
The bulletins had directed that certain of the dildo merchandize were not to be referred to as any specific mythical species until further notice. Supposedly, there’d been incidences of complaint regarding the Dibbler Dildo range, notably those informally described as having vampire and troll attributes.
I LOL'd IRL.
I call this revenge. Definitely revenge. I like the Men In Black vibe going on with the dwarf, fairy and elf being suit-clad...
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It seemed appropriate that the humanist concept should be turned on its ear. *grins*
This is also a take off of a type of joke that starts with 3 people/animals/other species; 'So a dwarf, a fairy, and an elf come into a
barcoffee shop and order a ...'no subject
It seemed appropriate that the humanist concept should be turned on its ear.
YES. I like. :D
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Just don't know what to say otherwise....you tend to do that to me lately *grin*
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But um there is sequel where we learn the new toys are very happy yes, yes?
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It's odd, initially I thought this creepy, but I was tired when I wrote it. Am really glad it worked and you liked it. Wasn't sure about it.
And MOI? I'm sane I tell you. Sane.
The toys are probably happy, the one with the dwarf more than likely is, *grins* better than the Dibbler Dildo of the same name. Don't know about the others.. *sighs* yet. Wonder if there's a little magical GHB going on.. hmm
Ever noticed how pets when they are taken along to stores with their owners seem to be nervous. Think it's because usually the trips are to the vets but maybe it's that they are in a strange place or afraid they'll be given back.
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Well they asked very nicely *is innocent*
It worked, there was a very creepy feel to it. I hope they're happy, I like peoples to be happy. Your choice if you write more or not, can see how it could break the tension of this story if you did. There's always plenty more plunnies in the sea. .....at the end of piers I hear ;) *hides*
Yes, yes, of course you are dear *discreetly hides all pointy objects* and may I say that's a very fetching foil hat that you're wearing?
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I want to do more, maybe will, but I like the edgy-ness of this too. *sighs* What to do, what to do. *rapidly tapping fingers on lips*
Thank you for letting me play in your Pleasures 'Verse.
What is your icon polishing?? They look like a Dibbler Dildo selection.
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He is. Well, not Dibbler brand, but otherwise yes.
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That was an interesting explanation you gave above, that they were nervous in the shop because they didn't want to be sent back. It would be sad to think they were generally fearful.
I agree with theotherdibbler that without more information, we can only conclude that the world can be a dark and dangerous place, but then that is true and we shouldn't neccesarily need rescuing from that discomfort. It will be interesting whether you decide to leave us with this or explore the mystery further.
A lucky escape for Eric.
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Sometimes my mind writes with a bare minimum of aim 'for here'. Sometimes what comes out is something more. *sighs* It's hit or miss.
It's an interesting comparison: troll/vampire/dwarf dildoes vs human pets
All are objectified, probably used for sex, and except for possibly one procured in a place that sells sex toys. hmmm
Difference is who is doing the acquiring.
Now back to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzlG28B-R8Y
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